______________________

Forbidden Fruit

“That would be lovely, boy”

sneered Hook, pealing back

the skin and nibbling”

—Ridley Pearson, Dave Barry

Peter and the Shadow Thieves

Little did I know—

The Secret Naughty Attraction

That Captain Hook had for Peter

I knew that Captain Hook—

Was a foul, despicable, smarmy

Pedophilic Pirate of Ill Repute

I knew that Captain Hook—

Was a disgusting, obsequious

Pervert of the Seven Seas

But I simply had no idea—

Just what a Perv he really was

Until Wendy spilled the Beans

“Peter is Eternally Young”—

Wendy said, “Everything about

Him is Eternal Fountain of Youth”

“Especially his Smegma”—

She said, “It may be cheesy

But it’s got Magic Hormones!!!”