KENTUCKY-FRIED SCIENCE-FICTION

KENTUCKY-FRIED SCIENCE-FICTION
_________________________

“The North never really thought
much about equality for blacks,
just found itself in the pleasant
situation of being able to feel real
good by pointing out how unjust
to the blacks the South was. That
was certainly easier than doing
anything themselves.”
—Percival Everett, A History of
the African-American People by
Strom Thurmond

1

“You know the rule, bub.”—
“All it takes is one drop of
alien bad blood.”

That’s how it began—
I lost my apartment and
My job as well.

They done snooped around—
And found out the awful truth.
I be ALIEN!!!!!!!!!!

I didn’t know it—
It be fuckin’ news to me!
What a shock it was!

It just took one drop—
Quarantined me just like that!
It was just awful!!!

2

I wasn’t even—
Tryin’ to pass for whitey
Like the Negroes did.

But I ended up—
A Mulatto Martian!!!
An Alien Dinge!!!

Suddenly I was—
Octoroon Venusian!!!
Exiled quick from Earth!!!

Stuck on a Slave Ship—
Shipped off to queer Uranus!!!
With all the Fag Thugs!!!

My genes were no good—
My veins be clogged with Bad Blood!!!
My penis turned green!!!

3

Planet Uranus—
It be Forbidden Planet!!!
All us Aliens!!!

I can’t tell a Lie—
Like there was a Black Market
For Alien Boyz.

Earth women liked us—
We were light-years ahead of
Earth Creepazoid Men!!!

We could fuck for dayz—
We could eat out chicks all night
They wanted us bad…

They abducted us—
I was a Kept Man out there!!!
The Ort Cloud Motel!!!

4

UFO spaceships—
Flatter than Denny’s Restaurant
Greasy white Pancakes!!!

We swooped down on Earth—
Mississippi chicks were cute
Cute & dumb Earthgirls!!!

The Biloxi babes—
Like they couldn’t get enough!!!
Sexy Abductees!!!

You know what they say—
Once you’ve gone alien then
There’s no turning back!!!

So that pretty soon—
We be seminal Breeders!!!
The Planet was ours!!!